HEADLINE – Chicago prepares for NATO summit
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MUNCIE, Indiana – Chicago police are preparing as best they can for protests against the pending summit of the National Association of Theater Owners (NATO) that begins tomorrow.
“NATO sucks!” shouted Jason Rabinowitz, a protester protesting NATO policy.
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“We don’t understand,” said Raj Hempstead, President of NATO. ”We know the price of popcorn is ridiculously high, but does it really warrant rock throwing and people lighting themselves on fire in protest?”
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”Look, we will lower the price. We’ll lower the price of all movie theater concessions. Like Milk Duds. We will lower the price of Milk Duds. Just please stop yelling,” Hempstead said.
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May 18, 2012 at 12:46 p05
Paul, I needed that.
After a hard day’s slog where nothing went right, to open a beer and then read this means that the dog may not get a kicking.
She sends her thanks, by the way.
May 19, 2012 at 12:46 p05
A great compliment. Glad to save your dog from your fucking abuse, you monster.
May 19, 2012 at 12:46 p05
Yeah, suuuuuure they’ll lower the price of milk duds. *snort*
May 19, 2012 at 12:46 p05
I don’t believe it as well.