Archive for the مصارعه Category

THERE IS A REASON WHY GEORGE BUSH PAINTS HIMSELF IN THE NUDE

Posted in And now the snorting starts, Artists Rights, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, Captain America, космическая девушка, Fashion Forward, gülen yüz, GOP, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, lächerlich, love, Money and Power, News, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, смешной, Politics, Post Modern Knock-Knock Jokes, The Great State of Montana!, The Wrath of Khan, مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, 滑稽, טילים, מצחיק, פיצה, بشار الاسد, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون, سياسة on February 12, 2013 by paulboylan

aasmokie

So I am sitting on the couch in my family room watching my son watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, when I comment on the recent news articles revealing that former POTUS George Herbert Walker Bush is an accomplished painter with a penchant for painting himself in the nude.

.

Opening Of New U.S. Embassy

.

“You mean he stood there looking at himself in a mirror?” My son asked.

“Yes, I suppose he did,” I responded.

After a short silence my son opined:

“Well, that makes sense.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Okay, let’s say you are a former conservative Republican President who likes to paint nudes,” my son says.

“Okay,” I respond. “let’s say that.”

“Well, then your possibilities are limited,” my son concludes.

“How so?” I ask.

“Have you seen Barbara Bush?” my son asks.

“His wife?”

“Yes.”

.

.

Barbara-Bush

.

“Oh,” I said, granting the point.

.

UPDATE:

I found out later that it is was recently revealed that it is George Bush the Younger (the one who started two long wars but didn’t pay for them and very nearly brought down the global economy), not George Bush the Elder (the one who scoffed at his critics’ complaints that he lacked foresight by referring to it as “that vision thing”) who painted and presumably still paints himself nude.

I didn’t inform my son of my error.  I value any exercise in critical thinking and, based on even invalid data his conclusion was admirable.

And it is very likely that the younger Bush paints himself nude because his daddy did it, too, and the younger Bush is competing with him artistically.

The following photo is of a painting obtained by hackers of the younger Bush’s painting efforts. It is a bit creepy because it is clearly derived from a photograph, which means George has a collaborator who takes pictures of him in the nude:

.

cn_image.size.bush-family-paintings-emails-02

.

The elder Bush was a better president (he fought Gulf War I, neutralized Saddam Hussein without creating a quagmire the US could not exit from).  The odds are the elder Bush is a better painter.

.

STUPID NEWS – Train kills disabled vets attending parade for disabled vets

Posted in And now the snorting starts, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, Is that really Ellie Goulding?, ανόητο άτομα, kluchtig, lächerlich, News, neşeli, смешной, Small Town America, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, Why do people in other countries talk funny? on November 18, 2012 by paulboylan

One of the hallmarks of modern journalism is the growing proliferation ofhstupid news./  Especiallyhon the internet./

Recently in Texas a train hit a float in a parade honoring wounded/disabled war veterans. Some of the disabled veterans on that parade float were killed in the accident.

.

.

Here is a follow-up story:

.

.

Well, that is a huge relief.  If the float was rented, those vets might have lost their deposit – and what a tragedy that might have been.

.

STUPID UPDATE!!

 

.

 

Posted in American Decline, And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, bacon, bilim adamları, buffo, пицца, End of the World Knock-Knock Jokes, gülen yüz, health care, 스타게이트유니버스, 재미, αστείος, lächerlich, Money and Power, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, смешной, ученые, pork, public outrage over the waste of public money, snaaks, The Great State of Montana!, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, urinary tract infections, مصارعه, 滑稽, טילים, מצחיק, פיצה, سكارليت جوهانسون on October 14, 2012 by paulboylan

.

If you haven’t done so yet, visit http://www.marriedtothesea.com.  No matter what your lot in life is, Married to the Sea can only make it better.

.

 

IT IS ALL OVER FOR OBAMA

Posted in American Decline, amusant, And now the snorting starts, buffo, dada, космическая девушка, End of the World Knock-Knock Jokes, gülen yüz, I think you are a social parasite but I want you to vote for me anyway, 스타게이트유니버스, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, kluchtig, lächerlich, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, смешной, Politics, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, 滑稽, טילים, מצחיק, פיצה, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون, سياسة on October 12, 2012 by paulboylan

.

An entire demographic of Obama supporters has switch its allegiance – and their votes.

.

blacks-for-romney

.

HEADLINE – MAN DIES AFTER WINNING INSECT EATING CONTEST

Posted in And now the snorting starts, Headline, Headlines, News, Small Town America, مصارعه, Weird Stuff on October 10, 2012 by paulboylan

First, a joke:

Question:  What are a red neck’s most common last words?

Answer:  “Hey, y’all, watch this!”

.

CRACKERBURG, Florida –  The winner of a roach-eating contest in South Florida died shortly after downing dozens of the live bugs as well as worms, authorities said Monday.

Cooter Renfield ate 600 German cockroaches, 300 Madagaskar hissing cockroaches, 200 Hercules Beetles, 50 crickets and an untold number of earth and meal worms before mysteriously collapsing.  He was pronounced dead an hour later at Crackerburg General Hospital.

“At least he died doing what he loved most,” said his mother, Charlene Renfield.

“That boy just loved eating bugs,” said Ethel Renfield, Cooter’s grandmother.  “Even when he was a baby he was always crawling around looking for bugs to eat. Maybe he spent a bit too much time with his grandfather.   I was always hollering ‘R.M.’ –  that was my husband’s name, R.M., ‘R.M,’ I would say ‘you stop that boy from eating bugs.’  But R.M. never did.  Truth be told, R.M. loved  him some bugs, too.”

R.M. Renfield made his name in the import business during the 1930’s before settling in Crackerville.

.

.

.

.

HEADLINE – POLAR BEAR SCIENTIST CLEARED OF MISCONDUCT

Posted in amusant, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, buffo, Canada, Crime and Punishment, пицца, Free Utilization Doctrine, gülen yüz, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, Isnt nature wonderful?, 스타게이트유니버스, 재미, αστείος, kluchtig, lächerlich, News, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, ученые, Our animal friends, photograph, Photography, public outrage over the waste of public money, Research and Development, snaaks, The Wilhelm Scream, مصارعه, سياسة on September 30, 2012 by paulboylan

.

The relationship was determined to be consensual.

.

HEADLINE – ROMNEY PANDERS TO MAINLAND CHINESE FOR CAMPAIGN CASH

Posted in American Decline, And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, buffo, Captain America, Cowboys and Aliens, disembodied heads of the rich and famous, космическая девушка, gülen yüz, Geopolitical Insults, good guys and bad guys, GOP, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, health care, I think you are a social parasite but I want you to vote for me anyway, 스타게이트유니버스, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, kluchtig, lächerlich, Mad Men, Money and Power, News, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, Occupy Mordor, photograph, Photography, Politics, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, Travel, مصارعه, Why do people in other countries talk funny?, טילים, פיצה, سكارليت جوهانسون, سياسة with tags , , , , , , , on September 27, 2012 by paulboylan

MUNCIE – After declaring China the “main enemy” of the United States and promising to start a trade war if elected, Mitt Romney announced plans to ask  Chinese nationals to contribute money to his campaign.

.

.

“I don’t see anything inconsistent or hypocritical about this at all,” Romney said as he attempted to open a window in his private jet flying to Hong Kong to attend a fund raising dinner. “Darned thing is broken,” Romney complained when he failed to find a handle to “roll down” the jet window.

.

.

“When Mitt was in charge of Bain Capital, he oversaw the export of thousands and thousands of American jobs to China,” said Romney Spokesman Trip Whiteman. “The least they can do is toss some cash at him in repayment,” Whiteman added.

.

.

“I love the Chinese,” Romney said. “They are all the right height.  And their workers are grateful for their jobs, they don’t have health insurance, it is very, very difficult to escape poverty, and they like me – which is what I want for America,” Romney concluded.

.

.

.

He has a vision.

.

HEADLINE – DEMOCRATS ACT TO SUPPRESS CONSERVATIVE VOTERS

Posted in American Decline, And now the snorting starts, Barry Goldwater, GOP, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, 스타게이트유니버스, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, Kansas City, kluchtig, Michele Bachmann, News, Paying Attention, photograph, Photography, Politics, Religion and Politics, Small Town America, snaaks, Stupid People, The Great State of Montana!, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, مصارعه, Why do people in other countries talk funny?, بشار الاسد, سكارليت جوهانسون, سياسة on September 17, 2012 by paulboylan

MUNCIE –  To counter Republican efforts to prevent poor people, minorities and women – groups that traditionally vote for democrats – from voting, the Democratic National Committee (DNC) has embarked on a campaign to prevent stupid people from voting.

“Smart voters will never, ever vote for Republican candidates,” former GOP presidential candidate Rick Santorumisaid recently.m

“Stupid voters are the bedrock of Romney’s re-election effort,” Santorum continued.  “Stupid people traditionally vote Republican,” Santorum said. “If they have a college education or read for pleasure you can be sure they aren’t going to vote for Romney.”

Mitt Romney’s campaign has spend millions of dollars in an effort to appeal to Birthers, knee-jerk jingoistic patriots, NASCAR enthusiasts, anti-abortion fanatics, proud morbidly obese Type 2 diabetics who don’t have or want health insurancei- even Snooki fans.I

 “We are currently negotiating to get an endorsement from the Octomom,” said an anonymous Romney campaign strategist. “If we can appeal to stupid voters while simultaneously suppressing the poor/minority/woman vote then we should be able to win this thing in November,” the Romney strategist said.

The DNC is fighting fire with fire. “If the Republicans try to prevent democrats from voting, then the DNC going to attempt to suppress the stupid vote,” said Trixie LaRue, a DNC spokesperson.

The plan is fairly simple:  the DNC will set up fake polling places/voting areas on election day with signs outside that read:

“A smart person will read that sign, understand the warning and not vote at that location.  A stupid person, however – i.e., a likely Republican voter – will probably not read the small print, will be impressed by the bright colors, and go into the fake area to vote,” LaRue said.

And when they get into the fake voting booth, they will be given the following fake ballot:

“The average stupid voter will believe they voted for Romney/against Obama, feel pleased with the result, go home, and never realize they didn’t really vote,” LaRue said.

“Early fake voting” is scheduled to begin tomorrow in Mississippi, Texas, Missouri, Indiana, West Virgina and Arizona.

A Flagrant Violation of Copyright

Posted in Fair Use, Fiction, good guys and bad guys, Money and Power, Monsters, Mordor, Parody, Politics, Post Modern Knock-Knock Jokes, presidential candidate, Pycho-Social Trauma, Religion and Politics, The Great State of Montana!, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, مصارعه on August 22, 2012 by paulboylan

.

video_subtitles.html

.

In the original, didn’t the idealistic good guys all die in the end?

.

THE CURLY SHUFFLE

Posted in amusant, And now the snorting starts, Art, buffo, greannmhar, IN MEMORIAM, 재미, αστείος, kluchtig, lächerlich, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, Paying Attention, Post Modern Knock-Knock Jokes, snaaks, مصارعه, مضحکہ خیز, خنده on May 19, 2012 by paulboylan

.

Those knuckle-heads are beginning to scuffle.

They push, and they shove, doing the Curly Shuffle…

.

.

HEADLINE – Chicago prepares for NATO summit

Posted in amusant, And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, buffo, Cinema, greannmhar, Headline, Headlines, Is that really Ellie Goulding?, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, kluchtig, lächerlich, Movies, News, neşeli, скарлетт йоханссон, Occupy Mordor, Paying Attention, photograph, Photography, Politics, Rage Against the Machine, snaaks, Stupid People, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون on May 17, 2012 by paulboylan

.
.

MUNCIE, Indiana –  Chicago police are preparing as best they can for protests against the pending summit of the National Association of Theater Owners (NATO) that begins tomorrow.

“NATO sucks!” shouted Jason Rabinowitz, a protester protesting NATO policy.

.

.

“We don’t understand,” said Raj Hempstead, President of NATO.  “We know the price of popcorn is ridiculously high, but does it really warrant rock throwing and people lighting themselves on fire in protest?”

.

.

 “Look, we will lower the price.  We’ll lower the price of all movie theater concessions. Like Milk Duds.  We will lower the price of Milk Duds.  Just please stop yelling,” Hempstead said.

.

.
.
.
.

THREE STOOGES (a fair and balanced comparison)

Posted in And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, Barry Goldwater, buffo, disembodied heads of the rich and famous, Early-onset dementia, GOP, Internet Fun!, 재미, αστείος, ανόητο άτομα, lächerlich, Money and Power, Mordor, Newt Gingrich, neşeli, смешной, Our animal friends, Politics, presidential candidate, Pycho-Social Trauma, Religion and Politics, Small Town America, snaaks, The Great State of Montana!, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, USA! USA! USA!, مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, 滑稽, מצחיק, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون on March 7, 2012 by paulboylan

Here are three stooges:

.

.

Moe, Curly and Larry.  

Moe is their leader. It is generally agreed-upon by pundits and intellectuals alike that Moe is head stooge and calls the shots for the other stooges.

,

Here are three more stooges:

.

.

This is not a balanced group of stooges. They appear to be three Larries.  Maybe a  Curly or two. One may aspire to be Shemp.  But who is their leader? Who calls the shots?  At best – and I do mean best – Santorum is Moe (bossy), Romney is Larry (easily confused) and Gingrich is Curly (a fat goof). At best.

.

I just love the word “stooge.”

Stooge.

Ha!

PUTIN ON THE RITZ

Posted in And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, buffo, Celebrity, disembodied heads of the rich and famous, пицца, Fashion Forward, Frankenstein, Geopolitical Insults, greannmhar, Horrible Coincidences, Internet Fun!, 재미, αστείος, lächerlich, neşeli, смешной, photograph, Politics, Pop Culture, Post Modern Knock-Knock Jokes, Putin on the Ritz, rimshot wav download, Russia, ruthless dictator knock-knock jokes, snaaks, The Great State of Montana!, مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, Why do people in other countries talk funny?, 滑稽, מצחיק, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون on February 18, 2012 by paulboylan

I know I shouldn’t, but I just can’t help myself.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

click on image to activate GIF

When Pigs Fly

Posted in Ahmadinejad, And now the snorting starts, おかしなふるまいの, अजीब, bacon, Celebrity, Food, Is that really Ellie Goulding?, 재미, αστείος, Joseph Bleckman, kluchtig, lächerlich, Michele Bachmann, Newt Gingrich, neşeli, смешной, Our animal friends, photograph, Photography, Politics, pork, snaaks, The Great State of Montana!, مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, مضحك, مضحکہ خیز, Vegemite, when pigs fly, 滑稽, פיצה, بشار الاسد, خنده, خنده دار on February 17, 2012 by paulboylan

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

مصارعه سكس

Posted in مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, What are you sick or something?, خنده, خنده دار, سكارليت جوهانسون on February 12, 2012 by paulboylan

.

يجب عليك أن تخجل من نفسك. ترك الانترنت وقضاء بعض الوقت مع عائلتك.

.

.

A Grim Fairy Tale – BOXING DAY

Posted in And now the snorting starts, boxing day, Cowboys and Aliens, Crime and Punishment, космическая девушка, Fashion Forward, Grim Fairy Tales, Horrible Coincidences, Isnt nature wonderful?, It's not what you think, 스타게이트유니버스, love, Missile Defense, ученые, photograph, Photography, Pop Culture, Post Modern Knock-Knock Jokes, Pycho-Social Trauma, rimshot wav download, Romance Language Knock-Knock Jokes, Rotwang, Small Town America, Sports, The Great State of Montana!, The Wilhelm Scream, The Wrath of God, The Wrath of Khan, مقاطع‏ ‏سكس‏ ‏مصارعه, مصارعه, טילים on December 30, 2011 by paulboylan

Hello, children. I am Brother Grim. Would you like to hear a true story?

.

BOXING DAY

Once upon a time there was a young woman named Jennifer. Jennifer lived in a place known far and wide as the City of Angels, which Jennifer liked because she considered herself a Born Again Christian, and living in a city of angels was fine by her.

.

.

Jennifer lived with a man named Robert.  They met in church and were married a year later.  The day after their first Christmas together, she found Robert’s secret briefcase hidden in the apartment bedroom closet.

.

.

The briefcase was large, hard shelled and had a combination lock with three numbers on rotating dials set side by side.  It was very heavy. She shook it gently, but didn’t notice any peculiar movement. She had no idea what was in it.

She tried to open it (of course), but it was locked and she could not open it. That is when she realized the brief case belonged to Robert, because she would have remembered buying something that could lock.  

She put the briefcase back where she found it and walked away.

.

.

But the next day she was in the closet again looking at the secret briefcase. She looked closely and noticed that the numbers on the combination had changed. She didn’t know how she knew, but she knew. She memorized the number combination showing – 0-8-7 – and placed the briefcase back in the closet.

.

.

A week later, she checked and saw that the numbers had changed to 4-2-7. This meant that at least twice in as many weeks, Robert had opened the lock, gone into the briefcase, and jumbled the numbers when he relocked it.  So Jennifer began to check the briefcase every day. Every day she tried to open it, just in case Robert forgot to jumble the numbers to set the lock.

One day the briefcase opened.

.

.

Inside, Jennifer found a pair of musty, sweaty boxing gloves, a stack of magazines and some video cassettes. Tucked into one of the organizer pockets inside the briefcase, Jennifer found a bunch of letters from men addressed to Robert at his office.

.

.

Jennifer read the letters and looked through the magazines. She even watched one of the videos. The magazines and videos showed men – and sometimes women – boxing and wrestling.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Jennifer learned from the letters that Robert would regularly go to the Olympic Gym near Downtown L.A., rent a boxing ring, and box with strange men—rarely the same man twice.

.

The Olympic Auditorium then.

.

They’d punch and pound and smack each other and then afterwards they would perform unnatural, sinful acts upon themselves as the other watched.  The letters would end with promises that the writer would inflict great bodily harm upon Robert the next time they met at the gym.

.

.

Naturally Jennifer confronted Robert about her awful discovery. She let him come home to find her sitting on their bed with the briefcase open, reading his letters.

.

.

Robert admitted everything—the boxing and the unspeakable, sinful acts. He admitted that he lied to Jennifer – that when he said he was working on weekends he was really meeting strange men at the Olympic Gym.

.

.

Robert admitted lying about playing rugby as a subterfuge to explain the injuries he sustained boxing.

.

.

That night Jennifer slept at her friend’s house and the next day she moved her things out of the apartment she shared with Robert.  She resolved that her marriage with Robert was over because lying, Jennifer knew, is a sin. 

.

.

.

The Olympic Auditorium now.

.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 43 other followers