YES, BUT WHAT DO THEY HAVE TO SAY?

The medium is the message.

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“The cows are all liars!!” yelled Farmer Brown when he heard the news.

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HEADLINE – MUTANT BUTTERFLIES FOUND AT JAPANESE NUCLEAR DISTASTER SITE

 

SOME PARENTS SHOULDN’T BE PARENTS

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“Pout, baby, pout! Give me all you got! Oh yeah… Yeah! That’s it. Now walk slower. No, slower….”

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At least they didn’t dress her up like a pot of honey.

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The Ultimate Ray Gun Girl Gallery

To access an image, click on it. When it comes up, click on it again to see it in its full size.

HEADLINE – RARE WHITE TIGER VILIFIED

Ass. Press

Posted: 05/29/2009 05:57:32 AM PDT

Updated: 05/27/2009 05:57:34 AM PDT

WELLINGTON, New Zealand —

Ass. Press

Posted: 05/29/2009 05:57:32 AM PDT

Updated: 05/27/2009 05:57:34 AM PDT

WELLINGTON, New Zealand —  Princess, the rare white tiger that killed one of her handlers at a wild animal park in New Zealand, has become the target for international criticism.

“That tiger killed and tried to eat that guy,” said Bill Chen, Human Rights advocate based in Beijing, China. “That tiger should be destroyed,” Chen demanded.

“William Chen operates a disreputable restaurant that specializes in serving meals made from endangered species,” said Ingrid Bledsoe, Animal Rights advocate based in Billings, Montana. “Chen sees this as an opportunity to expand his menu,” Bledsoe asserts. “He wants it to replace his Trumpeter Swan Fricassee.”

Many around the world are demanding that Princess suffer some consequence for attempting to devour her caregiver.  But others offer a different perspective.

“Princess has given joy to thousands of children over the years,” says animal park worker Ted Smedby. “But do they call her ‘Princess, the giver of joy?” No, they do not. Now they call her ‘Princess, the tiger that tried to eat that guy.’  It is so unfair,” Smedby argues.

HEADLINE – New Zealand Zookeeper Killed

NEW ZEALAND ZOOKEEPER MAULED TO DEATH BY RARE WHITE TIGER

Princess, the adorable rare white tiger who killed some guy.

Ass. Press

Posted: 05/29/2009 05:57:32 AM PDT

Updated: 05/27/2009 05:57:34 AM PDT

WELLINGTON, New Zealand — An animal keeper was mauled to death Wednesday by a rare white tiger at a wildlife park in New Zealand. The animal, named Princess, is one of only 120 white tigers in the world.

Princess is a third-generation white tiger born at the park.  Her mother was Queeny and her father was Prince Leopold.

“Genetic testing confirms Princess’ lineage,” said Gwen Mulumbimbi, Park Geneticist.  “Since there are so few of these magnificent animals left in the world, proper genetic management is essential to keeping the species from suffering the consequences of inbreeding,” Mulumbimbi said.

The park, located near the northern city of Whangarei, has 42 rare lions and tigers — four of which are white tigers — in large wire-cage enclosures that include trees and grassy areas.

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HEADLINE – INJURED BEARS RESCUED FROM BILE FARMS IN CHINA

AP – Jan Numberson, founder and chief executive of Bears Are People Too, feeds a rescued black bear.

By PHUC HU, Ass.Press Writer – Sat Feb 7, 6:07 am ET

CHENGDU, China – A dozen Asiatic black bears, malnourished and diseased from years spent on abusive bile-harvesting farms in southwest China, were recovering Saturday after being handed over to an animal charity group.

The Hong Kong-based Bears Are People Too Foundation took in the bears from secret farms in Sichuan province where holes were cut in their abdomens so that their bile could drip out to be harvested.

“This is a horrible humanitarian catastrophy,” said Jan Numberson, founder and chief executive of Bears Are People Too. “This is especially horrible considering that there is no known market for bear bile.”

Ted Chin, owner and operator of the bile farm tried to explain. “We are looking ahead,” Chin said. “Sure, there is no market for bear bile at this moment in time. Right now it is completely worthless, smelly, and difficult to store. But we believe that bear bile is on the cusp of becoming the new wild cat saliva.And when that happens, my company, IIlegal Bear Products, LTD, will be poised to dominate that emerging market.”

“Truth be told, I just hate bears,” said Ernie Han, Chin’s partner and co-owner of Illegal Bear Products.

The bears were given fruit mash before being taken away for a months-long rehabilitation program, which includes health checks, medical treatment and living in recovery cages under quarantine.

Phones rang unanswered Saturday at the Sichuan Forestry Protection Department.

 

A BOYLAN NEW YEAR’S FAMILY TRADITION

I must say I am somewhat shocked and surprised – but not yet astonished – by how many visitors this, my new blog, has seen.  I see many familiar faces from the now legendary JournalSpace diaspora. But I see an unexpected number of new faces, too.

My new friends are asking me some of the same questions my old friends asked me when they first encountered the grandure of my bearing.  That isn’t a another way of saying they were shocked by how overweight I am. That is not what I am saying.  To be honest, I could use to lose a few pounds.  But who couldn’t, especially after the holiday season when we cannot escape from running into food that we really aught not eat?

But I digress.  I have recently been asked “what happened that made you this way?”

I am forced by habit and custom to interpret questions like this to mean “what are the forces in your life that shaped the man you are today?”  I, too, have asked myself this very same question many, many times.  The answer is always the same: my family made me what I am today.

In particular, it is the family traditions handed down from generation to generation that have engendered the – person – that writes these words.  And no time are my family traditions more apparent  than at the start of a new year.

I am not sure how it started or why, but it has become a tradition throughout my family that, on or before New Years Day, we share with each other photos or videos of our pets eating.  You may find this strange, but it is a tradition, okay? And that makes it worth respecting.  Traditions are the bedrock of moral values, and it is moral values that made America great.

My Great  Aunt Hilda has a pet snake.  A really big one.  This is a vid of her snake, Princess Precious, eating a rabbit.

From my family to yours, have a very happy new year.  When all is said and done, we are only that which is reflected in the collective face of our family.

Which is why I’ve taken steps to cut myself off  from mine.  I have a big family. It is going to take time.

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