HEADLINE – BACKWARD GREEN COMET ENTERS SOLAR SYSTEM
By PAUL NICHOLAS BOYLAN, Ass. Press Science Writer – Tue Feb 17, 3:23 pm ET
WASHINGTON – An green backward comet is zipping by Earth this month, as it takes its only trip toward the sun from the farthest edges of the solar system. The comet is called Lulin.
“In addtion to being green, Lulin is perhaps the most backward comet ever encountered,” Dr. Krista Schurstein, Director of the California Astronomical Society said. “It believes that the earth is flat, that the Theory of Evolution is unproven and that a woman’s place is in the home,” Schurstein said.
“Lulin is too green and inexperienced to be taken seriously,” advises Joseph Bleckman, comet critic. “Except for that flat earth thing. I mean, Lulin is up there and can see if the earth is round or flat. So if Lulin believes the earth is flat, there may be something to that viewpoint.”
Lulin will not return to our solar system for three thousand years.
“Good,” Elen Smedby, noted feminist, says. “That comet is a jerk.”