HEADLINE – MICHAEL JACKSON’S MOTHER LOSES CONTROL OF ESTATE
By Rhapee Kanasta, Ass. Press Reporter
Today at the Neverland Ranch, Michael Jackson’s pet German Sheppard, Estate, slipped his leash and knocked down a child, shocking fans and paparazzi alike.
“It all happened so fast,” said Jackson’s mother, Katherine, who was out walking the dog when the incident occurred. “Michael’s Estate was behaving just fine, but when he saw that little boy, he got all excited, broke free, ran over, and began humping his leg.”
“Estate is a dog who loves children,” said Vinny Slimp, spokesperson for Estate. “It is believed that he is compensating for his deep feelings of not experiencing a happy puppyhood. He has been trying to make up for that ever since.”
“I am not sure what the humping is all about,” Slimp continued, “but I am sure it can be traced to trauma Estate experienced when, as a puppy, Joe Jackson – Michael’s father – forced Estate to perform tricks and left him alone for long periods of time with adult men.”
The dog is scheduled to be euthanized on July 8, 2009.
This entry was posted on July 6, 2009 at 12:46 p07 and is filed under Barry Goldwater, Food, Hapax Legomenon, Harvey Eisner, Joseph Bleckman, Life, music, News, Politics, Pop Culture, Pycho-Social Trauma, Rotwang, The Wilhelm Scream, Travel, TV, Uncategorized, What are you sick or something?, Why do people in other countries talk funny?. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.