HEADLINE – Argentina forces dirty war orphans to provide DNA

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Ulan Bator – The Argentine legislature has enacted a controversial bill requiring all war orphans residing in Argentina to provide DNA samples – but only if they are “filthy.”

“Just look at those dirty, filthy war orphans,” said Juan Hepilmeyer, Argentine Minister of Public Hygiene. “The Argentine government has finally decided to do something about the problem of dirty war orphans, and the first step is to collect their DNA,” Hepilmeyer said.

“I don’t care what the law says,” said Ricci Polinski, a hygienically-challenged war orphan who wanders the streets of Buenos Aries. “They won’t get of my DNA,” said a defiant Polinski as he picked his nose and wiped his finger on his shirt.

Hepilmeyer said that the new law authorizes the use of the Argentine Army to enforce the new regulations.

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Source: http://www.stltoday.com/argentina-forces-dirty-war-orphans-to-provide-dna/

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8 Responses to “HEADLINE – Argentina forces dirty war orphans to provide DNA”

  1. Running_Man Says:

    I accessed the link and yes it is the actual headline which is unfortunate.

    Like

  2. nymphsreply Says:

    why did it have to be stltoday?

    why?

    Like

  3. “stltoday”? Please explain.

    Like

  4. nymphsreply Says:

    I believe your source with the peculiar title is a link to “stltoday” which happens to be the #1 St. Louis website, a self-proclaimed title, and a representation of my dear metropolitan area.

    Like

  5. I didn’t access the link because I trust your sources. I also have thus far avoided the alleged #1 St Louis website because stitoday means nothing to me. Nothing! And I can’t see any relevance between the genetic study of Argenitina’s dirty war orphans to the subject city of a Judy Garland song. Unless there’s an evil plot simmering. There’s nothing more exciting than an evil plot being hatched by a potential evil overlord.

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  6. Nice one mate and if you’ve walked some of the streets in BA you’d not be asking for DNA samples!!

    Discussed this with my wife and we both agreed it was a crap law (no pun intended). I know your blog is primarily for humour but just wanted to add this.

    I always shiver whenever i walk past the School of Naval Engineering (where alot of the female prisoners were kept and had their babies delivered and many others were tortured). My wifes family were never really affected by the ‘dirty war’. But the scars are there throughout society and alot of people seem to just want to get on with their lives and this new law is potential going to make peoples lives harder on a personal level.

    I once was invited for a tour around the military’s primary officers mess in the centre of Buenos Aireas it’s a lovely building but the telling thing was that tucked away on a stairwell is a plaque commemerating those officers who died in the Falkands conflict (of course they call it La guerra de las Malvinas) its not very big or austentacious. In the central courtyard is a huge plaque commemerating those offcies who died in the dirty war agaisnt the communist terrorists. Of course they call it something slightly different. weird eh?

    Like

  7. Ulan Bator? Isn’t that the capital of Mongolia? Why are they reporting on the happenings in Argentina from there?

    A sign of the burgeoning global community perhaps?

    Like

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