HEADLINE – Attack is North Korean bid for attention
By Rhappee Kanasta, Ass. Press Reporter
SOUL -A frustrated North Korea is lashing out again, this time with a deadly volley of artillery aimed at reminding rival South Korea — and the world — that it will not be ignored.
Pariah nations attack their neighbors for a very simple reason, according to Los Angeles Area pediatrician Krista Schnurstein, MD. It works.
“Attacking a neighboring nation gets the neighboring nation’s attention,” Schnurstein said. “A sudden rain of high explosive artillery shells is effective because the neighboring nation can’t not attend to it.”
“Pariah nations are remarkably skilled at using techniques that push buttons that, in turn, launch missiles,” Schnurstein continued.
“North Korea’s type of response though, is something we usually see in an older, better-established nation, so I wonder where North Korea saw this modeled.”
“Fortunately it doesn’t matter. What matters is how the world responds. South Korea is off to a great start by telling North Korea that if it fires artillery at South Korean cities, then South Korea will cancel future play dates. In the meantime it is important to avoid putting on a show that will encourage future bids for attention.”
Schnurstein suggests responding to this recent North Korean aggression with a subtle approach. “Try some humor. Say something like, ‘Oh! You scamp! Attacking our cities was hilarious!’”
“Have a good laugh and then add, ‘Of course we all know that North and South Korea care about each other and have a wonderful time together!'”
“Let it go and back off and observe what North Korea does next.”
“If North Korea goes for more drama, then follow through with leaving immediately and taking a break for a while. Be sure to follow up with heart to heart talks during neutral times about the situation and ask questions like, ‘Could it be that you are destroying South Korean cities to get South Korea’s attention?’” Schnurstein suggested.
To avoid being attacked, Schnurstein advises South Korea not to wait until it is attacked. “It’s important for South Korea to respond to that first bid for attention,” Schnurstein said. “If South Korea is on the phone or in the middle of a conversation, make eye contact with North Korea and put a finger up, so North Korea knows South Korea will be there in a minute. Then give North Korea your attention as soon as you can politely do so.”
South Korean political strategist, Kim Li Kim, disagrees. “Perhaps the best and most effective approach would be to bomb them back into the Stone Age,” Kim suggested.
“Really, it wouldn’t take much to accomplish. Most of North Korea is already living in the Stone Age, and the ruling elite are few in number.”
“A couple well-placed nukes would eliminate the North Korean problem once and for all,” Kim concludes.