HEADLINE – Chicago prepares for NATO summit

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MUNCIE, Indiana –  Chicago police are preparing as best they can for protests against the pending summit of the National Association of Theater Owners (NATO) that begins tomorrow.

“NATO sucks!” shouted Jason Rabinowitz, a protester protesting NATO policy.

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“We don’t understand,” said Raj Hempstead, President of NATO.  “We know the price of popcorn is ridiculously high, but does it really warrant rock throwing and people lighting themselves on fire in protest?”

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 “Look, we will lower the price.  We’ll lower the price of all movie theater concessions. Like Milk Duds.  We will lower the price of Milk Duds.  Just please stop yelling,” Hempstead said.

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4 Responses to “HEADLINE – Chicago prepares for NATO summit”

  1. Paul, I needed that.

    After a hard day’s slog where nothing went right, to open a beer and then read this means that the dog may not get a kicking.

    She sends her thanks, by the way.

    Like

  2. paulboylan Says:

    A great compliment. Glad to save your dog from your fucking abuse, you monster.

    Like

  3. Yeah, suuuuuure they’ll lower the price of milk duds. *snort*

    Like

  4. paulboylan Says:

    I don’t believe it as well.

    Like

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