HEADLINE – MAN DIES AFTER WINNING INSECT EATING CONTEST

First, a joke:

Question:  What are a red neck’s most common last words?

Answer:  “Hey, y’all, watch this!”

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CRACKERBURG, Florida –  The winner of a roach-eating contest in South Florida died shortly after downing dozens of the live bugs as well as worms, authorities said Monday.

Cooter Renfield ate 600 German cockroaches, 300 Madagaskar hissing cockroaches, 200 Hercules Beetles, 50 crickets and an untold number of earth and meal worms before mysteriously collapsing.  He was pronounced dead an hour later at Crackerburg General Hospital.

“At least he died doing what he loved most,” said his mother, Charlene Renfield.

“That boy just loved eating bugs,” said Ethel Renfield, Cooter’s grandmother.  “Even when he was a baby he was always crawling around looking for bugs to eat. Maybe he spent a bit too much time with his grandfather.   I was always hollering ‘R.M.’ –  that was my husband’s name, R.M., ‘R.M,’ I would say ‘you stop that boy from eating bugs.’  But R.M. never did.  Truth be told, R.M. loved  him some bugs, too.”

R.M. Renfield made his name in the import business during the 1930’s before settling in Crackerville.

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8 Responses to “HEADLINE – MAN DIES AFTER WINNING INSECT EATING CONTEST”

  1. I hate it when that happens to me.

    Like

  2. Breaking: stupid prick dies doing stupid thing. More at 11

    Like

  3. In other news: the Darwin awards announce details of a new candidate.

    Like

  4. I am deeply disappointed no one got the Dracula allusion.

    Like

  5. Is his name “Cooter” or “Cooties”?

    Great name for a town – Crackerville, Crackerburg, Crackerstan … just rolls off the tongue.

    Like

  6. The “cootie” reference was accidental. I just picked the best red neck name I could think of.

    I saw a television program where a man was explaining that a red neck will do anything on a dare “which is why so many of us die in ridiculous ways.”

    Like

  7. Brilliant

    Like

  8. Found him on his back, arms and legs in the air.

    Like

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